The Ebb and Flow of the Mat

This week has been one of major shifts and transitions which have challenged me physically, mentally, and spiritually.  The past seven days I have worked 10-14 hour days with an average of 4 hours of rest each night. I have had more than 20 hours of training over 4 days. As a result, my body was susceptible to viruses that I can usually fight off quickly with rest and liquids. I also found myself a blubbering mess while trying to speak to anyone. One of the major transitions this week was the finalization of my divorce.  Yup, after 23 years, 14 married, I am now a "miss", again.  Although I felt tired and overwhelmed, I still practiced yoga every day. I even taught class for all but one day.

The morning of court, a photo, taken just a few days ago, was sent to me. As I stared at the image, I felt my entire being erupt with emotion. It was an image of me moving into a one leg plank from Three Legged Downward Facing Dog. I could hardly believe it was me. I immediately remembered the days when I could barely hold by body in Downward Facing Dog for 5 breaths. Yet here I was moving, flowing with the rhythm of my body and breath, in and out of these poses.  It was then I realized how showing up on the mat day after day had strengthened my body and allowed my mind to bend to imagine all the possibilities of my wildest dreams.

Yoga is a beautiful practice of balance of strength and flexibility. If we allow ourselves the space to move and flow, we will see the unimaginable become reality. Some days my yoga practice feels heavy.  The most I can do is Savasana. Then there are other days when I feel like taking flight. I can move and trust my mind , body, and soul to choreograph a sequence that could only come from the divine. Despite, my state of being, I care for myself by coming back to my practice everyday. EVERYTHING has a rhythm that connects us all. The tide, the sun, the moon, our heart all have a rhythm.  When we disrupt this rhythm with our own will, we inadvertently suffer and find ourself in a state of disconnect. We have one show up despite how difficult it feels. The universe is here to handle the rest. Namaste.

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